A fractured fairytale …
(A) Once upon a time, there lived a boy of ginormous proportions.
However he never really wanted to have enormous proportions he wanted to be small and like all the other kids in his class. He never knew it would come true but he never stopped wishing! Suddenly one cold wintry day when the air was still and smoke came from his mouth he heard someone speak it was certainly an unfamiliar voice coming from around the corner of the house. Around the corner came a lady with wide hips and bright blue eyes. Suddenly out of nowhere she tripped over a rock and off flew her clothes, I couldn’t quite see the beautiful lady I saw before instead I saw this small gnome looking creature however I was right, it was a gnome so I stepped up to the gnome and SLAM straight into the face.
(B) The gnome never saw it coming”. He fell straight to the ground and landed into a puddle. The boy said, “I don’t ever want to see you again and if I do, you’re going to get another SLAM into the face,” and with that the gnome jumped up out of the puddle and ran around the corner to hide from the boy. Once the gnome was well away from the boy he heard Mr Toad speaking in the cake cafe.
(C) “How was I to know the frosting was made of poison ivy!”, the frog exclaimed.
“I didn’t even bother to look at the bottle,I think I’m going crazzzzzzyyyyyyy,” it was so bad. It ruined the whole cake for my sisters 6th birthday. Then a sloth came from the roof and saved the day with a new cake, but now the roof was broken and how it needed to be fixed but at least my little sister got her birthday cake. The frog invited Boris around however he was tired and went home. The next day……..
(A) At that very moment, Boris walked through the time portal. He pressed the big fat red button that read “push” and then off he went shooting into the sky at 500 km/h, he was worried what was going to be around the corner. Boris jumped back to the corner of the time portal because a voice that was deep sounded through the speaker said where is your destination today and he scratched his head and said to my first birthday with my whole family, so off he went in the time portal to his first birthday. Boris wanted to go the his first birthday because he had forgotten all about it. When the voice spoke again it said “you have arrived at your destination and so out stepped Boris. He walked around the corner to where he could hear someone speaking, and there was Boris when he was a small baby. It was present time and Boris was opening his second present. Boris’s memory was coming back to him and he remembered that this present was a discus, it was an unusual present to give to a one year old but it was useful when he was older at Athletics. He could remember at one Athletics when he was doing discus he had brought his discus and was able to use it. One his first throws it slipped out of his hand and went flying over the fence…….
(B) The discus cleared the fence and flew toward the airport flying like mad, it went high and low when suddenly it crash into one of the planes windows. Thankfully no one had saw that it hit the window but the teacher said I had won. I had the blue ribbon in my hand when suddenly a man from the airport came over and said, “A person has thrown a discus, smashed a window and sent a person to the hospital”. Everyone glared at me so I ran for my life still holding the ribbon so I could show my mother, when suddenly I turned the corner and went crashing into a window and everything went black.
(C) It’s funny how windows can seem unimportant things like the other day I saw a car, through the window and I was like, why did I need to see that? It wasn’t even important to see. And that other time when the chair fell through the roof and came crashing into the window……
(A) But the flying chairs were the least of their worries.
They cared more about the car so they grabbed the keys that were hidden under the paper in the pinboard, they started the engine. I was unsure of what to do so I jumped on to the boot when a chick looking extremely unattractive squealed from the car…….
(B) “Hey you dummy – get down!” she yelled. She was driving and started going in a zigzag motion trying to make me fly off. It worked and I thought it was going to be alright when the chick stopped, turned the car towards me and went driving towards me, so I ran like mad going in every direction I could trying to escape……
(C) The beach seemed like the best escape option at the time.
No one was there so I ran for my life into the cold icy waters when suddenly a crab nipped me on the foot. I didn’t care as much about the crab I more cared about the car. I couldn’t see it anywhere. So I checked my foot which was bleeding and the crab came floating to the surface, it looked like I had stepped on it as it was dead and rather smashed up. I turned, there was, only just a few meters from me a giant holding the car with the chick in it. The giant tossed the car onto the sand…..
And those that survived lived somewhat comfortably, though in constant fear that another giant was just around the corner.